Goals, Video Games, And The Quest Mentality

Most Saturday mornings my husband and I can be found adventuring in our latest video game with a coffee and a cat each. We play some games co-op; others he controls, and I watch. We have lengthy discussions about gear and weapon upgrades, levelling, which areas of the map to explore, and character outfits. I keep an eye out for hidden walls and items, solve puzzles, and inevitably choose the benevolent dialogue option (I can’t possibly make a fictional character feel bad!). Dana has a knack for mental mapping and pattern recognition, so we are rarely lost, and he’s good at beating tough bosses. 

If all of that sounds like a foreign language, it doesn't matter. The important part is it’s fun! 

As you might be able to tell, playing video games with my husband is one of my favourite things. I’m a proud nerd gamer, so when I came across David Cain's article “Do Quests, Not Goals," I immediately connected with the metaphor.

The gist of the article is to reframe goal setting into what Cain calls a “quest mentality,” which he says is akin to a short-term goal, but “whereas “goal” has become a tired and bloodless descriptor for the (supposed) intention to do something great, the word quest instills the right mentality for achieving a real-life personal victory.”

He lays it out like this: 

• A quest is an adventure, and you expect it to be one. The goal mentality frames [puzzles, surprises, perils, and curious encounters] as setbacks, problems, pains – stuff in the way of the goal. In quests, they are part of the journey. 
• A quest changes you, not just your situation. Goals are practical attempts to change your circumstances. A quest is personally transformative – the endeavour itself shapes who you are and what you’re capable of.
• A quest has a dragon to slay (and it’s inside you). From a distance, the dragon always seems unconquerable, yet the hero finds a way.
• A quest can change the world. Everything great ever achieved required someone to overcome an internal obstacle.

I’ve written about goal setting several times over the years:

• Why Traditional Goal Setting Doesn't Always Work and What To Do Instead
• Planning in Uncertain Times: Try Themes, Not Goals
• Set Direction with Goals, Make Progress with Systems
• Take Aim: How To Reflect, Set Direction, and Make Progress In The Year Ahead

As I wrote in Why Traditional Goal Setting Doesn't Always Work and What To Do Instead, I’ve always struggled with more traditional goal-setting. Though I understand their value, I’ve always struggled to set motivating goals. When I discovered themes, they connected in a way that more traditional approaches had not, becoming the guiding light for my annual reflections (2021, 2022, 2023, 2024).

Cain’s metaphor of quests instead of goals provided yet another frame and got me thinking about it through the lens of video games. 

Specific video game genres use tropes that align with the quest mentality Cain outlined. I’ve taken this further and outlined additional ways to think about a quest mentality through some of those tropes. 

These six ideas are what came up:

1. Quests require a good home base

Most video games have a home base, which is the starting point for the journey and a place to return to level up and upgrade.

One thing that often gets taken for granted when we set goals is our home base. Having a place to set yourself up, be it a corner to work from, a place to keep your hobby materials, or simply a refuge when you need to rest, is critical to helping you get to where you want to go.

When you think about the quest you want to embark on, consider the state of your home base. Is it in a state to support you on this quest, or does it need some work?

2. Quests rely on the help of others

In video games, these others are called NPCs (non-playable characters). They are characters that sell you items you need, give you hints or tips, or add flavour to the story.

When you start your quest, remember no one reaches their goals alone. No one reaches the end of their journey without a bit (or a lot) of help along the way. In real life, it can feel hard to ask for help or advice, but just like in a quest, you will move forward faster and better equipped if you seek the advice, experience, and support of the people around you.

Who can you ask for advice, support, or help in your quest?

3. Quests encourage (even require) side quests

In video games, you usually have to meander to level up or get the required materials upgrade. You have to go in directions you weren’t expecting or do tasks that unlock the next area.

Most of the time, the path to your goal will not be a straight line. There will be places you must go or things you must do along the way to help you figure out the next step or get you whatever you need to keep going. 

Don’t be afraid to get curious and explore in different directions. The things you find along the way will likely enrich your quest.

4. Quests require you to backtrack or level up

In video games, sometimes you will wander into an area that’s too challenging and need to turn around, or you’ll encounter a mini-boss you can’t beat. It doesn’t mean you can’t continue; it just means you need to level up before trying again.

In real life, as you take steps forward on your quest, unexpected situations related to health, family, energy, or work will happen and block your path. Things might be more complicated than you initially anticipated. You might fail the first few times you try something. This doesn’t mean you have to quit, but it might mean taking a break or changing your approach.

Give yourself the space to backtrack and refuel, and then try again.

5. Quests rarely go to plan

In video games, the expectation of a perfect run is called hardcore mode. If you die or fail, you lose all your progress, everything you have acquired and have to start from scratch. 

Most real-life quests will not be on hardcore mode. They are usually not situations where things must go perfectly or you will fail miserably. Instead, you will likely set out with your plan… and it will probably go sideways at some point. It will not be perfect the first time. You will struggle and have times when you want to quit. You will take unexpected side paths and find things you weren’t expecting. 

No plan, no matter how well-researched, will likely hold up to random curveballs that life will throw at you. Set up your systems, do your best, and know it won’t be perfect. Keep going! 

This is where growth loops are a helpful approach!

6. Quests focus on the journey, not the destination

When you start a new video game, while the end boss is in the back of your mind, it’s never your primary focus. There are usually too many areas to explore, side quests to complete, and upgrades to acquire before it’s even possible to battle the boss. As with themes and aims, the end boss is the north star, but the journey to get there will be what truly matters.

So it goes with your real-life quest. Forge ahead and work towards the end boss (or Cain’s dragon), but remember to appreciate and enjoy all the things you learn and experience along the way.

What’s your next quest?

In his article, Cain says,

“Part of you knows that to live a great life, you need to do goal-like things, and do them on your own initiative. You need to form your own aspirations, define their completion criteria, and work towards them systematically… [but] the tendency is to wait for a better, less cluttered stretch of time to appear before you do that.”

That waiting is what I call deferring life, where you push things off to when you have more time. However, time is not a given, and life can change fast.

Cain goes on to say,

“This is exactly backwards. Forming and achieving aspirations is how life gets easier and more spacious. It’s how people build skills, gain experience, invent things, declutter their homes and lives, start businesses, and enrich the mind with art, exploration, and creative work.”

I couldn’t agree more. There is so much joy to be had in exploring your interests, learning, seeking out new things, or building something (anything!), be it a hobby, a home, a new skill, or a business. Your quest doesn’t have to be lofty; it can be anything you want. Approach it through the lens of adventure and curiosity. 

Embrace the quest mentality, and don’t let it sit on the horizon, waiting for a “better time.” There’s no better time than now! 

What quest will you start today?

Need a hand to kick off your next quest? Get in touch!