4 Steps to Dispel The Fall Scaries
Another September is nearly upon us. As always, I’m not quite ready to relinquish my grip on the long summer days, but they’ve already become noticeably shorter, and the temperature is coming down. The anticipation of summer is a drawn-out time in my world, and the weeks of warmth and green we eventually get never feel long enough.
You might have heard of the Sunday scaries, the anxiety that sometimes starts to creep in as the weekend comes to a close and you look to the week ahead with all its potential stressors. I’m starting to feel the fall scaries as I anticipate the crescendo to the end of the year, and I know I’m not alone!
The fall scaries are the anxiety and overwhelm you feel as summer comes to a close, vacations end, school starts, and the weather starts to turn.
I was recently on a restaurant patio with one of my good friends, who similarly lamented the final few days of summer as we sipped our cocktails. She said that September is her busiest, most intense time of the year - even more so than January. The kids start new grades, with new teachers and classmates, and some at new schools. There is all the preparation for a new season, new routines, and new after-school activities; traffic picks up, the weather turns, and everything that was postponed to “the fall” is suddenly… now.
The ease of the summer quickly diminishes, replaced by what can be a tsunami of fall stress.
It feels strange to be already thinking about the end of the year, but there are 18 weeks between today and January 1, 2025. That might sound like a long time, but it’s really not. I think we are all familiar with the feeling of the days and weeks blowing by, leaving us unsure where the time went.
Instead of succumbing to overwhelm and waiting until you collapse around the holidays (😅), let’s consider a more intentional approach to dispel the fall scaries and keep the coming months from getting too intense.
Four steps to dispel the fall scaries
1. Revisit the themes, aims, or goals you set at the beginning of the year
An excellent place to start to get ahead of the fall scaries is to look back at any themes, aims, or goals you set at the beginning of the year. These are things that might be hanging out in the back of your mind as things you “should get to,” or they might be things you said you would pick up again when summer was over. They might be habit changes, new hobbies, work metrics, or even big dreams. Whatever they are, take a few minutes to consider:
- What are they?
- Are they still relevant?
- Have you moved forward on them?
- Do they need to be revised, given your current circumstances?
- If they are still good, what is the next step?
Even if goal setting is not your jam, ask yourself: What would make the fall successful? What would you like to happen?
Once you have an idea of some things you would like to make progress on or have happen over the next few months, write down the first few steps or actions that move you in that direction.
2. Brain-dump all the commitments, to-dos, tasks, and shoulds that are swirling around your head
Now, you can add everything else that’s swirling around your head that you need to/want to/should get to.
Take stock of any existing to-do lists and commitments that you’ve already made. What are the tasks or actions you know will have to be done for them? With your themes, aims, or goals, brain-dump everything you can think of that’s been hanging over you or that you know is on the horizon.
It takes a lot of mental effort to carry those things, so get them out of your head!
3. Do a priority check-in
Once they are out of your head, you can decide if they are worth your time, energy, and attention. Are all the things you listed actually a priority?
This is the most critical part of this exercise. Some things to remember:
- Time is not the problem—we all have the same amount of time—the problem is having too many priorities.
- There are things that matter and things that don’t. Be clear on which is which. (Glass balls versus plastic balls)
- There will always be more to do. You CAN’T do it all, so do what matters.
- Every time you say you don’t have time for something, you are saying it’s not a priority.
- Every time you say yes to something, you are saying no to a million other things.
Revisit and narrow your priorities.
- Do what matters
- Do what moves the needle on your themes, aims or goals
- Do what brings you joy
- Do what fills your bucket
Obviously, you have to deal with plenty of practical things in your daily life and at work that don’t fit into any of those categories: chores, responsibilities, and obligations you have to do that you don’t want to do (though you might have to do).
These are normal; that’s life. The idea is to do your best to ensure those things don’t dominate your days. You want to include them on your list, but also be thoughtful about where they truly rank when you consider what’s important.
4. Map it out, block off time, and create reminders
You have this glorious list of all the things you could do, all the things you want to prioritize, things you think you should do, and your themes, aims, and goals. Now you need to see what fits!
Even better than making a list is visualizing what’s coming up and seeing what's possible, given all of your commitments. The outcome here is to use your calendar to set realistic expectations so you don’t overcommit and add any fuel to potential or existing burnout.
- Go to your calendar's four-week or monthly views and fill in all the commitments you are aware of.
- Add additional blocks for the tasks and activities required to execute them.
- Add any relevant reminders in the weeks leading up to things.
Consider things like:
- How many commitments are you willing to make each week? Block off the times you want to keep open.
- How much time will you need to prepare for certain activities? Where does that preparation time fit?
- When do you need to book/plan/prepare for certain events?
- Are there commitments that you will need help with? Who can you ask and when?
- What commitments might be challenging, and how can you reduce their impact?
- Are there any commitments you can remove/quit/withdraw from because they don’t fit your priorities?
- When will you rest, move your body, do fun things, and take care of yourself?
- When will you spend time with the people you love?
Visual reminders and queues will help you establish and maintain boundaries and stay ahead of events so they don't sneak up on you at the last minute.
With all that out of your head and mapped out, you have a good roadmap to get you through to the end of the year. Will it all go as planned? Absolutely not. Will it help keep things from getting too chaotic even when things don’t go as planned? You bet.
The idea isn’t to overplan your whole life but to check in on where you are at now and be intentional about what you know is coming down the line. All kinds of unexpected things will come up that will adjust (or scrap) your best-laid plans, and that’s ok. This upfront effort is meant to help you manage those things as they happen so you can adjust on the fly.
A little upfront, intentional planning will go a long way to dispelling those fall scaries so you can enjoy all the lovely things the coming months have to offer.
If the fall looks like it might get out of hand (or is already there!), get in touch to learn how I can help you find your calm.